Succeeding through people

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Climbing up the social and economic ladder depends on more than mere professional ability. One needs more than mere intellect to reach great heights in life. It is very important that you possess what is known as ‘people-skill’. People-skill allows you influence people to your benefits. It comprises of emotional intelligence, communication skill, social skill, motivational skill, and the ability to persuade other people. When proficiency in people-skill is added to a substantial level of intelligence, such combination is impeccable!

Only very few people in the entire world possess both high proficiency in people-skill and high level of intelligence. This is because in most cases, what accompanies high-intelligence is a low level of people-skill, and what accompanies average or less than average intelligence is a fair level of people-skill. And while this happens to be the majority of cases, there are few people who show an exceptional ability to influence other people, while possessing an admirable level of intelligence. These people may be enjoying the benefits of genetic factors and relevant life experiences. 

So many of us lack people-skill because we do not understand how important it is. Where intellect cannot take you, people-skill will. People-skill is one of the key skills that people are supposed to acquire and develop- sadly, it is not a skill you learn from formal education. And while some people are genetically favoured to exhibit a high level of this ability, most people will have to learn it on their own. People-skill may not be taught in school, but it could be learnt by reading helpful materials like this one. 

Developing people skills requires having the understanding that people are selfish by nature, and will rarely show a kind gesture if you do not appeal to their selfish interests. Moreover, most people are more inclined to see other people as a means to an end, and as such, may only associate with or manipulate people who can be helpful to them. In other words, the reason a poor man has no friends is very clear. In most cases, if you want other people to help you with something, you must be able to show them (implicitly) that you can be of great help to them

Now, kindness in the world is a beautiful thing. But people who are both kind and naïve are bound to be victims of manipulation and abuse; that isn’t very beautiful. Kind people are easily taken advantage of because they are ignorant about so many things. They tend to give away a huge part of themselves, only to suffer the undying selfishness of their neighbours, leaving them in a sorry state. With respect to people-skill, you must avoid making yourself a victim of users. You must also find a way to maneuver manipulators and users wittily without seeming rude and hostile. In other words, you must be as wise as a serpent but appear as a lamb. 

Secondly, people love it when other people agree with them and give them the liberty to do what they want. No one likes being criticized or scolded. The more you agree with other people (even when you know that what they are doing is not very good for them), and the more you look on as they get on with their destructive lives, the more comfortable they will be around you. Therefore, if you want other people to be helpful to you, allow them to self-explode by their own choice. Stop trying to be a hero; although you have good intentions, they may hate you for it.

Be respectful and polite to other people. Never show an act of scorn. People are sensitive to how other people treat them, and love it when they are treated as highly valued people. You don’t necessarily need to treat other people as if they are celebrities (it is not even advisable), but it is important you do not treat them as if they are worthless; they will hate you for it. Let strangers be strangers (mind your business), apologize to enemies (even if you do not mean it), and show concern about the wellbeing of your colleagues (even if you have to fake it). You may never know the importance of all these until you need their help. 

Lastly, make sure you are successful. People are more likely to be of help to successful people because they believe that these people can make their lives better. The more successful you are, the more you are likely to meet people who will be willing to help you in life. The less successful you are, the more people will drift away from you. Therefore, work very hard and make sure you achieve success, so that successful people like you can be drawn to you, and you won’t have to worry about lacking anything.